


Blood

by xspike4evax



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 14:41:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16088198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xspike4evax/pseuds/xspike4evax
Summary: Draco and Luna meet at the spot where Dumbledore died.





	Blood

The wind was cold, with a stinging bite to it. Long icy fingers brushed the back of his neck and tried to squeeze their way down between his scarf and the collar of his jacket, but Draco Malfoy pulled the thick fur coat closer to him, forbidding the wind to touch his already cold skin. 

His black boots crunched across the crisp grass as Draco made his slow, silent way to the Astronomy Tower. He automatically shrunk deeper into the warmth of his coat, recoiling at the very idea of going there in the first place, but he knew deep in his heart that it was time. 

The sky overhead was dark, the last light of day slowly ebbing away over the mountains which were standing out stark and still against the backdrop of the dreary grey sky. Winter was coming, darkness was falling across the country, although darkness had already fallen on the grounds of Hogwarts, and ice had already settled itself in his heart. 

Tramping around the last corner, his toes steadily growing numb, and his fingers, shoved deep into the pockets of his coat as he had left without his gloves, were absolutely deadened with the cold. Draco finally reached his destination. As soon as his eyes rested on the grass, the long blades dancing in the harsh wind, brown and yellow leaves skittering around the stone base of the Astronomy Tower, Draco’s memories of the fateful night Albus Dumbledore had met his death descended upon him. 

Draco didn’t need to attend the scene of the crime to remember every little detail. The night in question was ingrained in his memory forever, never to be moved, never to be forgotten, always to repulse and terrify him. 

It was not that Draco was concerned his old headmaster was dead exactly, really, the life of Albus Dumbledore meant little to Draco Malfoy, as did most people around him. It was his own part in the great wizard’s downfall which bothered him. It was the fact that when push had come to shove, when the going got tough, when it came right down to the nitty gritty, he, Draco Malfoy, had been unable to kill an unarmed old man. There had been nothing standing in his way, no spell, no charm, no defence. Nothing except his own weak mindedness. 

Draco glared bitterly at the patch of grass his friends had since told him had been the place where Dumbledore’s body had been found. What was the matter with him? Was he, Draco Malfoy, son of Lucius Malfoy really so pathetic? Could he really not rise to the challenge as his father had done before him? Was he so far from the man he wanted to be that he was incapable of performing as a Death Eater should? 

Lifting his pointed chin, Draco turned his face defiantly into the wind. No, that was not the reality of the situation. If he needed to, Draco was sure he could be a man like his father, a Malfoy through and through, looking out for himself. After all, supposing everything went wrong for the Dark Lord? 

“I didn’t expect to see anyone else here.” 

The soft, dreamy voice startled Draco and he jumped. Turning quickly, he inwardly cursed himself for being an idiot and not ensuring his wand was easily located. He had let his guard down, something a Death Eater should never do. 

“What are you doing here, Lovegood?” Draco demanded frostily. 

Luna smiled, a light disarming smile that immediately put Draco’s back up as she wasn’t cowering away from him in fright, or gazing at him with awe. One or the other had frequently been happening to him since his return to Hogwarts in September. 

“I came to put some flowers down for Professor Dumbledore.” She moved past him towards the foot of the Tower. “We aren’t allowed down to his coffin, so I come here instead. I’m sure he would like it, and Harry would want me to,” she added. 

Draco scowled at the mere mention of Potter’s name. The boy just didn’t know when to lie down and die! He didn’t answer her however, he simply watched her as she put her bedraggled looking purple flowers at the base of the tower, securing them with a stone she picked out of the dirt. Draco figured it probably made sense for this lunatic, with her windswept hair, lavender bobble hat, Ravenclaw scarf and dark blue knitted coat that practically hung off her small frame, to come traipsing out here in the cold to pay her respects to a man who was just as crazy as she was. Dumbledore had been a dithering old fool, and Luna Lovegood would most probably end up just like him, Draco decided as she stepped back to stand beside him. 

“Didn’t you bring flowers, Draco?” Luna asked, wondering what it was that put such a sad look into such interesting eyes. Draco Malfoy had the most interesting eyes she had ever seen. 

“Why in Merlin’s name would I do something like that?” Draco asked, positively appalled at such a question. 

“It’s what most people do when they pay their respects,” Luna explained, struggling with a wild strand of hair which refused to remain tucked behind her ear. 

“I’m not here to pay any respects,” Draco told her firmly. 

Luna’s large blue eyes widened a little more at this information. She was silent for a few moments as she tried to digest this. "Then why," Luna finally asked, "are you of all people out here?” 

“What difference does it make to you?" Draco demanded. "Didn’t anyone tell you not to stick your nose into other people’s business?” Annoyance crowding in on him that she couldn’t just go away after leaving her flowers. 

Luna sighed quietly, “Well, it’s your eyes you see….” 

“My eyes?” Draco repeated, total surprise causing his eyebrow to quirk. 

“Yes. I’d explain if you’d be quiet for a just a moment,” Luna offered with a soft smile. 

Draco glared, but all the same, he pressed his lips into a tight line to keep all the scathing remarks he wanted to unleash on her trapped inside his mouth. Whether he was being stupid or not in wanting to know her meaning, Draco did want to know. 

“You see, your eyes are so deep, and they look so sad. It can be quite heart –rending to look at them. I was really rather moved that you felt so deeply for Dumbledore’s death and I assumed you were blaming yourself for an error of judgement. But,” she tilted her head and glanced up at the sky. “I’m pretty sure Dumbeldore wouldn’t want you to suffer over what happened. You did want you felt you had to do at the time. I’m sure he forgives you for it.” 

Draco drew in a deep breath, the air cold in his lungs as he steadied his temper. “Well,” he exclaimed. “I was just thinking how much like Dumbledore you are and you’ve gone and proven my point.” 

“Really?” Luna beamed at the comparison. 

“Oh yes,” Draco drawled nastily. “You’re both complete idiots!” 

Luna’s mouth popped open into an astonished O. Draco may have been one of many who were frequently calling her names and making fun of her, but she hadn’t thought for a moment that Draco could have such a low opinion of Dumbledore! Albus Dumbledore had after all, been one of the greatest wizards of his time. 

“Did it ever occur to you, that I just don’t care the old fool is dead?” Draco demanded heatedly. 

Luna shook her head, “No.” 

“Well I don’t. I don’t care at all. And I’m not bothered that it was my, how did you put it? Oh yes, “error of judgement”, that lead to his death! I don’t need you trying to grant me forgiveness from beyond the grave, or trying to save my soul, or whatever it is you loony do-gooder’s do!” Draco yelled, angry strips of red colouring his cheeks. 

“I’m not trying to save your soul,” Luna told him wearily. 

“Good.” 

“Your soul will remain intact I should think, Draco,” Luna said thoughtfully. “Considering it only gets tarnished when you kill, and you can’t kill. So I think you’ll be fine.” 

“Can’t kill?” Draco echoed, his voice low and dangerous. “You don’t think I can kill?” 

Luna automatically backed away as he loomed over her. Draco was so much bigger than her, physically stronger than she would ever be, and for a split second a lick of terror flickered in Luna’s chest. Out of the both of them, it was Draco Malfoy who had the power. He wore the Dark Mark, he was a known Death Eater and he could do no wrong now that Severus Snape was headmaster at Hogwarts and the Carrow siblings were in charge. He could hurt her, and hurt her badly if he chose to do so and no punishment would be forthcoming to him. 

Luna Lovegood was not the sort of person to back down where her beliefs were involved, and she saw no reason to back down to Draco now. She hadn’t done before, and she refused to let him frighten her. 

“No, Draco. I do not believe you could kill someone any more than I could,” she told him firmly. 

Draco snorted. “Wrong on both counts, Lovegood. If someone was coming at you with a killing curse on their lips you’d be surprised at how quickly you’d kill.” 

Luna shook her head slowly. “I’ve fought the Death Eaters twice, Draco. I never tried to kill anyone either time.” 

“Then you’re even stupider than you look,” Draco retorted. 

Luna surveyed Draco for a few silent minutes before she spoke again. “I take it back. I think you just might kill someone if you were scared enough. It’s just you haven’t reached that level of fear yet.” 

“What do you know about fear?” He challenged, his grey eyes boring into her face, trying to interpret every line and finding her impossible to read. 

“Not as much as you,” Luna admitted, automatically reaching out and placing a small hand on his shoulder. 

“You’re right about that if nothing else,” Draco acknowledged bitterly. “Do you really want to know why I didn’t do it?” 

Luna swallowed nervously and nodded her head once. She was so close to the secrets behind Draco Malfoy’s eyes that she couldn’t have turned back now even if she had wanted to. Luna stood very still, her blue eyes trained on his face, watching every flicker of emotion and each thought passing through his eyes. She was so close to him now she could feel the heat from his body radiating towards her body like a magnet, offering her some light relief against the bitter iciness of the wind. 

“The first lesson I was ever taught was that I should look after number one. That’s what I’ve always done. Do you fully appreciate what it would have meant for me to kill Dumbledore?” He leant in closer to her, his breath warm on her cheek that was pink from the cold. “It would mean there was no way back, if everything fell apart, if the Dark Lord, for some unimaginable reason, should fail, then I would be the one to pay the price for it,” Draco told her in a hushed voice. “I’d have blood on my hands, Lovegood, the first real blood spilled of the war was Dumbledore’s, and I sure as hell wasn’t having that on my hands.” 

She was afraid to answer in anything other than a whisper in case it broke the spell that was currently between them, Luna sense Draco needed to talk, needed to tell her this if only to have it out in the open where he could sort through his secrets himself. “I understand.” 

“No you don’t.” Taking his shaking hands from inside his pocket, Draco held them up to her. The skin was as pale as the rest of him, fingers long and elegant with perfectly trimmed nails and an onyx ring glinting on his one hand. Luna thought they were soft hands, the hands of the upper class who didn’t have to bother with the daily grind of work. She watched as he turned them over slowly and deliberately for her to see each and every patch of skin. “You see, not a speck,” Draco said in a sing song voice. “No blood, not a trace. Not now, not ever. If you kill once, surely it becomes easier? Just another life, just another little bit of blood until before you know it your hands are dripping in blood.” 

Luna shuddered violently, she was frightened, but she didn’t know why. Draco wasn’t going to hurt her that much she knew, but the fear was still alive and tingling in her chest. 

Lifting his hands, Draco moved them slowly towards her face. Her skin was just as cold as his own when his hands finally touched her face, pressing hard into the soft skin, pushing it backwards up her face as he spoke. “All the blood from all the different lives start to bleed into each other. Dripping and dripping, always more and more of it until your entire life is swimming in blood and there’s nothing you can do about it. No matter how much you want to, no matter what you do, your life is just one big pool of blood.” 

Luna shook her head as his hands pressed further into face. She could feel the skin being pushed upwards, gathering in big lumps underneath her eyes and her lips pulled tightly across her teeth. Luna pulled free, completely frightened of this side of Draco. “Stop it,” she gasped, stepping away from him, wrapping her arms tightly round her shivering body. Whether she was shivering from the cold or from Draco, Luna didn’t know. 

Draco laughed shortly, a harsh brittle sound that hung in the still air. “I won’t go to Azkaban for anyone. No blood, no murder, no life imprisonment,” he said simply. 

It made sense, he made sense, and Luna wondered if that was the scariest part of all. No, she shook her head slightly, the scariest part of all was that she still felt sorry for him, and she wanted to help him. Except she knew there was no way to help Draco Malfoy, he would do what he needed to do. He would do what was best for him and to hell with everyone else. 

With a huge sigh, Draco moved, he stepped around her and prepared to walk back inside when Luna caught his arm and stopped him. He glanced down at her impatiently, what else cold she possibly want to talk about? 

Swinging up onto her tip toes, using his arm for balance, Luna pressed a soft kiss to his frozen cheek. “Stay safe, Draco.” 

Draco’s eyebrows drew together in a scowl. “Don’t ever do that again,” he warned, before shaking her off and stalking off across the grass. 

As she watched his retreating back, Luna hoped there would be no more blood in Draco’s life. No matter what he said or how he acted, she felt deep down Draco just wasn’t able to cope with bloodshed. 

Pushing off on her heel, Luna followed Draco’s example and headed back indoors. She couldn’t help but wonder where this cunning, manipulating Slytherin side of Draco had come from. She wondered vaguely if it was all him or whether he had been taught by his father. Lucius Malfoy was a master of such arts, or so Luna had been lead to believe. 

Draco had longer legs than she did. He was out of sight by the time she reached the castle. Another harsh gust of wind curled around her, tugging at her hair and the ends of her scarf, stealing her breath with its icy body. Luna shivered and hurried up the steps into the castle foyer. Clapping her hands together to warm her fingers she headed up the staircase her mind on the roaring fire in the Ravenclaw common room. 

Standing in the shadows of the corridor, Draco watched Luna arrive back and scurry up the stairs, her cheeks reddened from the cold. She didn't see him, which was Draco's intention. He just wanted to see her, watch her for a moment and try to work out why had he even told her all that stuff in the first place.

Once Luna disappeared down the opposite corridor Draco turned away towards his own common room. He hadn't really needed to watch Luna return, he already knew why he had spoken to her as he had; because even if it was just for a few minutes, Draco wanted someone else to be as frightened as he was.


End file.
